June 19th, 2004

Owl Side

A small musing...

....on how long it actually takes one to be completely rational in one's feelings towards an ex-significant other. I believe I've achieved "mostly rational" after several years. However, I had hoped that by now I would have moved on towards "completely rational". Though perhaps this isn't always possible where intense feelings were concerned?

This musing was sparked by the soon-to-happen wedding of an ex, on the subject of being invited or not. From a rational perspective, it's completely sensible that I wouldn't be invited since I wasn't all that close to him afterwards and I might assume the bride wouldn't be pleased to have her groom's ex-girls hanging about.
The non-invite status was not actually bothersome until two other people I know (and am fairly close to) were invited, one of whom is planning to go.

Rationally, it should not matter one whit that they were invited. By rights, they should have been. He was and is close to them both.

Irrationally, the non-invite status is irksome. Which makes little sense since I'm not even sure if I would go had I, in fact, been invited.

Gah. Stupid illogical emotional responses.

So now, the survey portion of our venting entry: How long has it taken to you to return to being completely rational about an ex, after dating? Does it matter who the split was initiated by? What circumstances affect your current rationality when dealing with him/her/them?