Jalen Strix (jalenstrix) wrote,
Jalen Strix
jalenstrix

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Arg

I am awake, for no good reason at all. I can't remember the last time I had a really good bout of insomnia. I feel like I should be off doing something, perhaps baking bread or doing some work on divergences or some such. I suppose it's more a feeling that I'm awake for some particular reason. Though that's likely wishful thinking on my part. Ah well. And so I ramble.

I feel good, most recently, about befriending Don - a fine dancer and very Paris-like person. I think I feel good, in general, about befriending Paris-like people. It's a good habit to have, as habits go.

If I'm still up in an hour, perhaps I will go off and bake bread. Tsk, this non-sleeping thing. I know I'll pay for it tomorrow by being a proper zombie in the afternoon. Luckily, I don't think I have anything too important scheduled.

Erg. Frustration. I wish I could get my brain to stop racing so I could go to sleep. My dreams have been fitful lately. I wake up excited, heart-pounding, with little memory of whatever it was I dreamt of.

Of course, in the dark like this, I do get a feeling of magic that comes of being awake when most everyone else is asleep. Not quite the same as the moment I wrote about a while ago, but magic nonetheless. Alert. Quickened. Something.
Tags: meditation, personality
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